Imagine you want to take me out to lunch for some reason. Sounds great — a couple of things, though:
- In order for you to buy me lunch the one time I’m going to need you to commit to buying me 35 additional lunches, as per a restaurant and time of my choosing.
- Should you wish to opt out of this agreement you’ll still have to show up at the same time and place plus pay the full amount for any remaining lunches, up to a maximum of $200.
- In addition to the penalty I’ll be needing 30 days advance notice of your intention to cancel. I, on the other hand, can do so at any time.
If this sounds completely ridiculous, it’s exactly what I had to sign up for with my current wireless carrier. I’ll be giving my 30 days notice of cancellation today, with a keen eye on this advice so I can take my phone number with me. And yes, I’ll be paying the maximum penalty.
Shit sandwich, anyone?